They have got into bed with Julian Assange because the Wikileaks are "a good story" (though not quite as good a story as they make out) only to discover he has torn his condom; the protective brand marked On All Matters We Must Support The Feminist Attitude To Rape - in that all reported rapes are genuine, there is never any malice or motive such as desire for revenge or cash or sympathy; and that women are 99% abused and violated by men when they claim so.

Now don't get me wrong; I love the Guardian; it is the best written paper and has usually decently liberal values.

But it is also often gloriously hypocritical. I remember that factually its coverage of my trial was by far the worst and most inaccurate of all the papers, including the tabloids. They never allow a seed of doubt about the probity of false accusers to creep into their coverage of the topic.

Now here they are, definitely puzzled by whether to support Assange or condemn him. Their Editorial on Saturday was hilarious; the sound of squeaking as buttocks winced on the edge of the fence could be heard miles away.

A far better "story" than Wikileaks or whether or not he is guilty of sexual assault!